The Uchiha Journal
by zfirze
Summary: Property of Uchiha Sasuke. Death to those who read. You have been warned. - Yaoi, sasunaru -
1. Day Zero

hello! i'm starting a new story again! sorry about that but i was getting tired and probably a little stressed by my other stories so this is a sort of reprieve...

to keep this as close to a form of journal, this will probably be the only author note so here i would ask that if anyone has any idea or suggestion to share, you are warmly welcomed to (:

disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me

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Day Zero

...I must be mad, starting a journal in honor of the dobe. Maybe the Hyuuga is right about my mental sanity...

Nah.

At least unlike him, I am acknowledging my somewhat miniscule attraction to the moron. And at the very least, I _do not_ stare at Naruto as openly as Hyuuga stare at Sabaku. I wonder who he thinks he is kidding. Himself? Because the whole village definitely know long ago that he has a thing for the Kazekage.

...I am veering off topic. Or more accurately to say, I am avoiding the topic.

After all, what is there to discuss? I admit my attraction to Naruto. There, end of story.

Not.

I am definitely not the type to just leave it like that. Everyone knows that Uchihas abide strictly by our law, rule, motto, whatever it is called. We, Uchihas, get everything we wanted.

And no, I do not want him, at least not in that way. I may be a seventeen year old ninja but I am definitely not one of those hormonally driven type.

...Alright, so maybe there is a little of some physical attraction here and there but I would like to reemphasize that _that_ is not the main point.

If I really have to put a word or sentence to it, I guess I could say that I enjoy his company.

The truth is that thought came to me a few days back. To say that I was startled is an understatement. For heaven's sake, I was having a quiet and peaceful dinner in my own dining hall and suddenly the thought occurred to me. I wasn't even doing anything remotely related to _him_.

So there went my dinner. Instead, I spent my time, dare I say, reminiscing about old times. I reflected upon all the times we spent together and all the dangerous situations that we managed to pull through. The thought of Naruto always being beside me was very comforting. It seemed that somehow, I had grown to become dependent on him.

Of course I denied it at first. I hate the notion of being dependent on anyone.

Here is where the last few days come in. I spent my time observing. Observing him and the way our delicate friendship now works. It is weird at times, him being able to understand me more than anyone else. The same way that I could predict his thoughts and movement the way no one else could.

Unlike what I had believed, it is not dependency that exists between us. To be more accurate, it is trust. We trust each other and hence open our minds to subconsciously adapt and adjust to the other's behaviour. Naruto may not realise it, but I definitely do.

I do not believe in love. I prefer the word companionship. Maybe this companionship that I wish for would lead to an intimate relationship between us. I guess that it would be acceptable.

And so begins my attempt at what girls termed as wooing. Of course, seeing as the time now is eleven at night, my attempt would have to start tomorrow.

I will state here very clearly that I, Uchiha Sasuke, will always get my way.

And just to make sure, I am not being sappy and I have not gone soft. This is not a love journal. This is a journal to chronicle the progress of the relationship between Naruto and me. For me to review what foolish things I have done and would be doing for him.

I always call him a moron but I guess I am a bigger one, doing all these for him.

I scoff at myself for that but I will not deny the self-accusation. Pointless to, really.

Signing off.


	2. Day One

Day One

So I thought I would start simple and subtle. Nothing major changed from our usual routine.

We received a simple mission in the morning. Just the two of us only now, seeing that Team Seven is almost officially disbanded what with Sakura working in the hospital more than anything else and Kakashi's presence being non-existent.

A C rank mission of collecting a parcel for the Hokage. No doubt it was another debt that she had obtained, if the appearance of the person who delivered the package was anything to judge by. She was in a sour mood when she opened it in front of us and we almost missed lunch when Naruto talked back to her and was almost knocked out.

Of course, Naruto had plenty of practice dodging flying projectiles thrown by the Hokage and the paperweight that she threw created a small hole in the wall and knocked out another person instead. Though since the messenger was carrying a stack of paperwork to her office, it made the coincidence so much more highly suspicious. We figured that she might have been aiming for him all the while.

And we went on about our merry ways, debating a little on the amount of the debt we guessed she owed. The only point we agreed on was that the amount was not small. Naruto reckoned that the debt was not new and that the Hokage was just procrastinating on paying. Obviously not. Did he not hear that she had disappeared for a while a few days back? No doubt off to gamble her money away again.

So anyway, Stage One of my plot was succeeding. We were somewhat happily chatting away, meaning that we would be having lunch together and would spend more quality time together as well. Right?

Wrong. Guess who appeared.

Sai.

Bloody hell. The guy needs to get a clue. I was glaring at him when he joined us at the ramen stand and all he did was to smile that fake smile of his back. And of course with him there, Naruto's attention was all on him.

Then again, I probably would be too, if Sai was insulting my anatomy's size. I wonder why the two of them never got sick of the same old repetitive banter they have been having for the last three years. Move on.

And I was ignored. Imagine my irritation at hearing the two of them arguing obscene things over lunch.

Needless to say, the day was ruined. Why? Sai was free the whole day. That speaks for itself.

It ended with Sai and Naruto sparring with me by the side, practicing my aim. Which, by the way, was deadly accurate today.

I strode off after a while. And no, I was not sulking, as Naruto puts it. I was just debating the lovely coincidence of Sai suddenly appearing right after I decided to take actions. Especially after two weeks' of no show. Coincidence, not likely.

So there I went, thinking that I had to spend the evening by myself which was totally not according to plan. I resigned myself to the hard cruel fact that Naruto is extremely dense. Subtle probably would not work. Who was I kidding? Maybe if I threw it right into his face, then he might just realise.

...no, I have not sunk that low yet. If subtle does not work then maybe mild-subtle might. I should start planning for tomorrow.

Anyway, back to the topic. I strode off, expecting to be alone for the evening. Since I was feeling more antisocial than usual, I decided to have dinner back at my compound. So grocery shopping it was.

And guess what? Surprise surprise. After I gave up hope of spending time with Naruto that evening, he appeared. Grousing about Sai and about me leaving without him. He was sulking a little and I wondered what happened between him and Sai.

Oh well, none of my business, I guess.

Somehow, he managed to convince me to let him cook for me. I was somewhat mildly impressed until he told me he had just learned to make ramen. Imagine my horror. Ramen for lunch from Ichiraku and homemade ramen from Naruto for dinner? Madness.

I relented anyway. Stupid, really. His ramen noodles were not even close to the worst ramen stand's standard. The noodles were of different sizes, a little too much flour and a little hard. Some were sticking together and some were overly soaked. Not too sure how he managed that though. The soup...I think he mistaken the sugar for the salt. No doubt he did not taste-test before serving it to me.

He waited for my opinion, sitting on the edge of his chair and looking very eagerly at me. I definitely did not disappoint, I hope. I gave him two words. It sucks.

Of course he yelled at me for a while, saying that I did not know how to enjoy good ramen and that it was definitely good since he learnt from the best ramen chef there ever was in the world.

He threw it into the sink a second after he tasted it. We had instant ramen for dinner instead. Big difference.

I went back a while later when there was nothing much else to do. We still have not cross over the small little line that stops either of us from staying over at the other's.

...maybe that should be my aim? Hmmm...

Signing off.


	3. Day Two

Day Two

Well, I am still in shock at what happened today.

Yes, I had a plan and no, it failed. But something else occurred. Something even better. And I did not even initiate it.

Head out of the gutter please. We did not do anything explicit. Che.

So then, we had a normal day spent on training. Unlike _yesterday_, there was no unwelcomed guest. And we cleared a little of the forest, burning up some trees and cutting down some in the process of our training. When we were done with training, we went for dinner. As per usual. Then somehow after dinner, we ended up walking around the town and happened to chance onto a newly opened bath-house slash hot spring.

Correct. We ended up visiting it. And I was not even the one who suggested the idea. Naruto just went all excited, his eyes gleaming with anticipation and topped with an extra wide grin. Well, I could never refuse him when he was like that.

Especially not when this could help to contribute to my plan as well.

So Naruto bounced into the bath-house and we headed for the showers to clean up a little. There, he suddenly turned shy. It was weird, seeing Naruto flushing and ducking his head low as he hurriedly tie a towel around his waist and avoiding all eye-contact. I guess Sai's words really affected him a lot.

Naruto was almost drowning himself in the showers when I headed there. I smacked him viciously across the head to knock him out of it. He mumbled something sheepishly before forcing himself to grin. I had grimaced and gave him another smack. He got riled up after that and attempted to shove my head under the spray of water cascading down from his shower. We ended sharing a shower head. Luckily there were no other people. Probably the bath-house was still too new to garner enough attention to compete with the other bath-house across Konoha.

We bickered a little as we showered, so there was no awkwardness between us. It was great by the way, at least Naruto was not uncomfortable with the idea of us being both naked and squeezing together under one shower.

Anyway, he had trouble with scrubbing with a spot on his back and I offered to help. He grumbled a little and I think that he was attempting to tell me he had a scrubber-like thing at home. I shrugged it off and just took the cloth for him.

He tensed a little at first but relaxed after a short while. I guess he was just not used to having someone helping him in this way. Actually, I hope no one had ever helped him scrub his back. Anyway, his back muscles were slightly stiff so I helped and massaged his back a little. I rubbed small circles onto his back and I swear I heard a sigh of satisfaction.

Of course I gloated when I heard that. It was too hard to resist. He raised his voice and was all flustered when he yelled at me, calling me a bastard and such. I was used to it so I did not give much thought into his words and just dipped the wet cloth down between his ass cheeks. The yelp he gave was even more gratifying and I had to refrain from laughing at his expression.

I wonder if he caught the hint when I purposely did that. Normal friends would not help the other to clean the area near their private parts. Right?

Hopefully he realise that I was trying to tell him that I wanted to be more than friends…

Anyway, we moved on to the hot spring a while later after he flung another towel into my face. We settled into the warm water nicely and just stared out into the sky. Open-aired hot springs were pretty nice, especially at night.

So we stayed that way for a while, sharing a comfortable silence and enjoying each other's company. I like moments like this. It really made me appreciate his presence more.

Naturally, it did not last long. After all, Naruto could only go so long without talking. He started on some strange subjects that eventually led to us discussing about Kakashi and Iruka-sensei. Apparently, he was still in shock and disbelief that Kakashi had somehow gotten together with Iruka-sensei and claimed that Kakashi must have tricked Iruka-sensei in one way or another.

Which I actually agree. Now, just how did Kakashi did that? I think that would be a great guide for me to follow.

But no, I would not resort to asking Kakashi. Asking him would be like telling the whole of Konoha that Uchiha Sasuke is not asexual. And I would really like to keep my reputation of asexuality intact. At least it would ward off some fangirls and fanboys. Better not to raise those people's hope or things might get out of hand.

We left the hot spring and the bath-house a while later and I was just about to invite Naruto to stay the night over at my place, using the excuse that we were both pretty tired and my compound was much nearer. The words never left my mouth. Naruto had hurriedly run off, saying that he had forgotten about something important.

Damn. And I was so close. Wonder what could be so important?

Oh well, I guess I just have to leave that for another day.

At least we progressed a little. I think.

I mean, bathing together does count for something right? Hmmm…

Signing off.


	4. Day Three

Day Three

There are only two words I have to describe my mood now – pissed off.

Along with the urge to kill Uzumaki Naruto.

I woke up in the morning and was accosted by Sakura almost immediately. Turned out that the new apartment that she was going to move in with Lee was done with its renovations and so after they moved in that afternoon, the couple was going to hold a house-warming party. Aka tons of people attempting to get drunk.

Just as I was about to out-rightly reject her offer, Naruto bounced into view. Apparently Sakura had already invited Naruto and the two of them had conspired to trick me into going.

Naturally, I was convinced. Like hell I was going to let Naruto go alone. Who knew what would happen.

So Sakura's plan of convincing the insociable Uchiha to a social event succeeded. QED for Quite Easily Done, in this case.

Needless to say, the party itself was a mess. By the time Naruto and I had reached, the place was full to the brim with people. Whatever new decorations that Sakura had painstakingly came up with were hidden by the flash lighting, the booze and the mass of bodies attempting to dance. It looked like those dodgy underground bar, if you get what I mean.

And as things go, nothing ever went my way tonight. I was somehow separated from Naruto, not surprising considering the throes of people, and Karin managed to latch herself onto me.

Okay, maybe I should backtrack a little and explain why Karin, and for that matter Suigetsu and Juugo, were in Konoha. Let's see, hmmm… well, I guess it was because of the whole Akatsuki-bijuu fiasco.

Long story short, we never really did join the Akatsuki and when the attack on Konoha was officially launched, we weren't on their side. So after the whole mess was cleared, the four of us were allowed to stay in Konoha as long as we follow the conditions set. For me, it was simple. I was confined to being a genin, despite my skills, for at least three years. Probation period of sorts. Karin, Suigetsu and Juugo had it rougher. The Godaime decreed that their genin status was to be taken away and they have to earn it again. That's right, they have to rough it out with the brats at Konoha's Ninja Academy and have to retake their genin test. Test of loyalty, according to her words.

Amazingly, none of them really complained about the decree. Oh, they grumbled a lot on the whole genin education but on the Godaime's order? Zilch.

That was two years back and the three of them have not graduated yet. Thankfully. As it was, I had to listen to their moaning at least once each week. Not something anyone would ever look forward to. And if ever they graduate, I would have to suffer through hearing them talk about the D-rank missions they were sure to receive.

And so, here I am at the party and there they were too. They saw me and they - well actually, it was only Karin - clung to me. Do not ask me why Sakura had even invited them.

I spent the rest of the night stuck listening to them talk about the lousy aim those brats at the Academy have, how they were so much better and well, you get the picture. Unfortunately for me, Karin and Suigetsu were also utterly drunk. Suigetsu couldn't even hold up a cup and Juugo had to constantly remind Suigetsu to pull back the body parts that kept dissolving into puddles.

It was really near the end of the whole party did I manage to see Naruto again. Most of the party-goers had left, talking loudly and drunkenly, stumbling on their way out. Naruto was still bouncing around, albeit a little unstable on his feet.

Watch my horror as he planted himself in front of Sai.

Of course I could not let Sai take advantage of Naruto's drunken state. And Sai was very very sober. Probably more so than me since I did took a few cups of sake to alleviate my headache. Not the best of decisions now when I think about it.

So I strode up to them and yanked Naruto away from Sai. Thank goodness Naruto still recognises me and half-slurred my name out, grinning widely. The next thing I knew, he was planting a sloppy kiss onto my cheek.

Shocked is a good word to describe my expression then. Of course my euphoria did not last long. Just when I thought that maybe it was Naruto's way of saying that he liked me, guess what he did to spoil this?

Naruto went around, planting a kiss on anyone he could lay his hands on.

I left promptly after. Not even bothering with the idea of looking after Naruto and making sure he would be able to get home.

As an afterthought, maybe I should not have left him at the party by himself. There were still many lechers surrounding him, but for all I care now? Well, it was to have nothing to do with Naruto.

I would probably forgive him tomorrow anyway. I am an idiot.

Signing off.


	5. Day Four

Day Four

Remember what I said about forgiving Naruto the next day? Yes, it happened. Hard not to give in really.

So the day started normally or well, as normally as it could without Naruto's presence. Bet he was still having a hangover at that time.

Ate a quick breakfast before heading for the Mission Centre and guess what? I was tricked by Nara and ended being roped in as a substitute teacher at the Ninja Academy. Supposedly, it was a C-rank mission but truthfully, I think it falls under B-rank. Terrible experience. Reminds me of my resolution to _not_ be a chuunin teacher.

Horror, the lot of brats. I could see where Karin and Suigetsu were coming from. Thankfully though, I didn't have them in my class.

…then again that might not be so fortunate, at least they had aim. Even if Karin is a leech.

I was in charge of the field training class and took some of the brats for some shuriken throwing practice. And I am pretty sure that this was not their first class.

Wondering why their aim was so bad? And yes, I actually believe it was worse than normal.

Why?

Reason number one, the girls were not looking at where they were throwing. Amazingly though, they never hit any innocent bystanders.

Reason number two, the girls seemed to be giggling at me.

Reason number three, the boys looked very angry and were throwing their shuriken forcefully. Be reminded that strength does not equal aim. I was trying to drill that into them but they gave me this glare.

I glared back of course, what were you expecting? Me to take their disrespectful look? _Please…_

They were not really intimidated actually. Maybe I lost my touch? No, doubtful. The girls, however, swooned even more. Maybe that is what was causing the boys to react so negatively towards me.

Really though, there should at least be a minimum age for girls to become fan-girls. Sakura and Ino did not start fan-girling that…young…

Actually they did. I just remembered, Sakura told me in one of her drunken stupor. And let me tell you, Sakura and alcohol does not mix well. I learnt first-hand of her strength and never want to be on the receiving end ever again. I wonder how Naruto last so long after being hit so many times.

So anyway, I took only that one class for the late morning and was just dismissing them when Naruto popped in.

He totally destroyed my strict image by pouncing on me.

Naturally, I ignored him and the pointing and giggling from the class and proceeded to lecture them on their faults. I let them off after a few minutes, seeing that none of them were listening.

Bet those boys were feeling their masculinity being restored. Brats.

Naruto dragged me off after that. Pulling me along while saying that I could choose anywhere for lunch.

Read: Pulling me along while telling me I can go anywhere I choose. What a contradiction.

I stopped him and shrugged off his hand before turning around to one of the quieter restaurants. Bear in mind, at this time I was still angry with Naruto for the kissing stunt he pulled off yesterday.

Sitting myself at one of the booth near the back, Naruto quickly and rather quietly joined me. It was really strange seeing him so subdued but I was not going to break this…tension between us.

He looks guilty though and seems to be distancing himself from me a little. I wonder why? I thought I had already reined in most of my anger. If anything, I was expecting him to tease me a little about last night or tell me some strange stories from the party.

Instead, he just sat there and ordered a drink. I was glancing up at him and frowning as I ate my rice. Naruto not eating? Has the sky fallen?

We left the place in an awkward silence and I was almost tempted to do _something_ to make Naruto to go back being loud and irritating.

Almost.

Naruto gave me a silent look before turning, clearly indicating for me to follow him. I hesitated for a while.

He led me to one of the training ground before motioning for me to sit down on one of the rock there. Leaning against it, I remembered raising an eyebrow and looking questioningly at him.

Naruto took in a deep breath before he yelled out an apology. To say I was taken aback was an understatement. I mean, who would expect someone – anyone – to bring you to a quiet place, sit you down like some honoured guest before yelling at you. Okay, granted he was apologizing, but still…

I lost track of what he was babbling on about halfway. I think the gist was that he mistook me for a girl last night and thought me pretty.

Wow, what a consolation. Thinking I was a girl. And did he realised what he was implying? It was like he is saying that he goes around kissing pretty girls.

Meaning, he's straight.

Never mind that he thought I was pretty. Was that even supposed to be a compliment?

After he finished yell-apologising at me. I stood up and made to walk away. He looked crestfallen at my reaction and I rolled my eyes before inviting him for dinner at my compound.

He looked like a puppy getting a bone when I invited him. Bounding over to me and asking me over and over again whether I had forgiven him.

I was still getting over the implication of Naruto being interested in girls and was trying to convince myself that maybe Naruto was bisexual. I mean, it was not the first time that I have known that Naruto does have interest in girls. Look at how long he had been crushing on Sakura.

And I also got the impression that he thinks that I was disgusted with him kissing me yesterday. Please, it was only on the cheeks. We had even accidental-kiss on the lips before. Why is he kicking up such a big fuss?

So after some of his ceaseless whining from the training ground to my compound, I relented and chucked him the chopping board to shut him up.

I think he recognised this as my sign of forgiveness since he stopped babbling. Instead, he attempted to help me with dinner. I kicked him out of the kitchen in a matter of seconds.

He pouted before slouching to the living room.

Things were still rather awkward between us throughout the night. I think Naruto is blaming himself. That guilty complex of his.

He left before I can actually tell him that I was not angry with him.

Oh well, he should be alright tomorrow. Otherwise, I guess I will just have to treat him to ramen. Doubtful that this will destroy our friendship. I mean if I could 'betray' Konoha and he can still accept me back, this should be a rather small thing.

Hopefully, he will regain his spirit tomorrow.

Please let him regain his spirit. See, I begged, now shut up.

Signing off.


	6. Day Five

Day Five

Was rudely woken by the Hokage's hawk. Damn it to the seven hells.

So anyway, the hawk came and summoned me to Tsunade's office, ruining my plans of heading over to Naruto's and checking up on him. Okay well, you can say I had been thinking and maybe, just maybe my actions to him yesterday were not very clear. With that dense brain of his, I guess he could not tell that my anger at him had already dissolved and that I actually understood his rationale behind all of his idiot actions. After all, I cannot exactly expect Naruto to read my mind.

Imagine the horror if he could actually do that.

Godaime made me her errand boy for the morning, running about passing notes and instructions to various jounins. I think it was something to do with the chuunin exam this year. Not too sure since I am still not allowed to take part in the exam yet, although I am actually wondering how I am going to get past the group section since a genin team needs three members to take part.

In the first place, I am not even sure if Naruto is taking part in this year's exam. He never mentioned anything and I never asked. It is still a pretty sensitive topic between us since I am the reason he had missed so many years of the exam.

Somehow, I managed to finish sending out all the notes by noon, so I headed back to the Godaime's office and it just so happened that I met Hyuuga there on a mission briefing. Hence conveniently, I was sent out with Hyuuga to Suna. I know Hyuuga was going there to discuss the details of the chuunin exam since this year's will be held over there and the Kazekage had requested for some advice on the event. But me? I have no idea why do I need to accompany the Hyuuga to Suna and I seriously doubt that he needs an escort.

Did I mention that Hyuuga had willingly volunteered himself to take over Nara's duty of being the Konoha-Suna Alliance representative? No? Well, I just did. No prize for guessing the reason correctly.

So there I was, glaring a hole at the Hokage's face for sending me away for Konoha. Just when I actually want to find Naruto, something like this would occur. And I actually doubt it is a coincidence since Tsunade seemed to be looking at me more hatefully than normal. She had never liked me, especially since I kept associating with her precious Naruto.

We set off immediately after lunch and made our way silently towards Suna. Well, I guess since both of us are not the real chatty type, the journey was bound to pretty much silent. At least travelling with Hyuuga is not as bad as travelling with Inuzuka, his presence is still tolerable.

The Kazekage actually met us at the gates of Suna and the way Hyuuga's eyes lit up was almost visible. Well, not really but the change in his posture was very visible. I wonder if anyone else actually notices it.

I was thoroughly ignored as they walked to Sabaku's office, not that I minded. I was still cursing the Godaime for sending me over when a voice interrupted my thoughts.

A voice which I was very glad and – dare I say? happy – to hear. The cursing in my mind quickly changed to gratefulness.

Naruto bounded into the office liked he actually belonged there. He really is on very good terms with Sabaku seeing that Sabaku did not so much as twitch at Naruto's loud entrance. He greeted Hyuuga loudly before realizing that I was there as well. His greeting towards me was not as loud as it was to Hyuuga and the tension in the room seemed to increase suddenly.

The four of us stood there for a moment, none of us moving. Hyuuga was frowning, glancing between Sabaku, Naruto and me. Sabaku had an angry expression on his face and looked almost murderous. Naruto seemed to be scowling and groaning at the same time, resulting in a weird wrinkle on his forehead instead.

Without further prompting, Naruto and I left the room at the same time. Seeing that Naruto knows Suna better than me, I allowed him to lead me to an area near the borders.

I am not too sure how it started but all of a sudden we were fighting. Naruto was yelling at me while throwing punches and I was doing my best to defend myself as I tried to make sense of Naruto's angry garble.

He calmed down after we fought for a few minutes. I think even Naruto was not too sure what exactly he was angry about. He continued calling me bastard and the usual as his punches became weaker and his words became softer.

I could not resist flicking his forehead when he half-scowl, half-pout. He threw me a resentful look and I think I might have accidentally smiled a little since he suddenly blinked and looked surprised before smiling lightly. Oh well, at least my half-smile seemed to resolve whatever conflicts he had with me.

We went for dinner together. Naruto, amazingly, brought me to a non-ramen place and actually said that their food was good. We seemed to be back to normal, so I guess everything is fine now.

Anyway, Naruto had apparently told the Hokage that he was going to Suna. Makes me actually rethink what was going through her mind when she assigned me to travel to Suna with Hyuuga. Women had a weird way of thinking things through, especially those who are above fifty.

After checking back with Hyuuga who was staying the night at Suna – Naruto gave a pretty suggestive wink to the pair of them – and taking a note from the Kazekage to pass to our Hokage, we left for Konoha.

All the way back, Naruto chatted. Chatted about the chuunin exam, the way Hyuuga and Sabaku looked at each other and all the other random stuff that just happened to appear in his mind. It was a really big difference from the journey to Suna and I could not say that I did not enjoy it.

It was really late when we reached Konoha and we quickly dropped off the note at the Hokage's office before returning to our respective homes. She was sleeping on her desk and Naruto just had to take the bottle of sake in her hand and place it just out of her reach. I quickly moved it back when Naruto was not looking. That was the very least I could help since she practically gave me a chance to mend things with Naruto.

Signing off.


	7. Day Six

Day Six

Current location – the wilderness of the Land of Fire. Current state – dirty and grimy. Current mood – disgruntled.

Current mission – scouting.

Yes, that is right, Naruto and I had been assigned to a scouting mission. Naruto is still way over his head about getting a B-rank mission.

After we had returned from Suna and the Hokage had regained consciousness, we were summoned to her office at five in the morning. It was even far too early for Naruto to be his usual loud self to yell at her. He just stood there, stifling his yawns. Not that I was any better.

It turned out that the return scroll from Sabaku contained some information about the other Villages looking to send their ninjas for the chuunin exam. And among them was the Village Hidden in the Rocks. Not too sure of the details but I had heard that Suna and Iwa are not on good terms after one of their contracts fell through a few years back.

Nevertheless, it seemed that animosity does not stop a Village from participating in a chunnin exam. Probably something to do with boasting about the strength of their ninjas, I guess.

We were thrown some standard issue jounin uniform and travel pack. Imagine our reaction.

No no, really. Think about it. Our level of skills is already at least jounin level but technically speaking, the both of us are still at genin rank. And due to various reasons, for me anyway, we remained as genin for a few years now. So to be issued jounin supplies is somewhat shocking.

I swear Naruto fully awoke when the jounin packs were in his hands. He definitely seemed to have perked up.

We left to change into our temporary uniform in the bathroom and Naruto was gushing over it more than doing any actual changing. He sounded like he had never seen those flak jackets.

Still wondering why Naruto has been refusing the chuunin exams for the last two years though. Neither of us will have any problem passing it with ease.

If we can get over the team requirement thing, that is.

We left Konoha after Tsunade-sama briefed and nagged us a little more. Not wanting us to get caught and to, I quote her here, 'please at least pretend and act like a real jounin'. Reckon she was referring to Naruto's excitement and well, hero-complex.

Honestly speaking, I think all this Village ego thing is getting to her. I mean, any decent ninja should be able to recognise us. And it is still a pretty big news to the rest of the other ninja Village that the both of us are still genin. I have no idea how she wants us to hide that fact.

The chuunins in the guard house at the entrance of Konoha were already gawking at us.

We had been travelling for a good half of the day, leaping over branches after branches. You think that when we had been assigned a fairly high-ranked mission, Naruto would prioritized the mission first.

Apparently not. His stomach won.

It resulted in a short argument and fight between us. Naruto wanted to stop in this small village that we passed so that we could try that small little stall that looked to serve ramen.

…could he find a better time instead to decide to savour and sample the ramen of every stall he set his eyes on? No, it just had to be on a mission. The first high-ranked mission we received in fact. Great mind he has.

He won the argument. By sheer force.

My wires were already out and were ready to twist and wrap around him, ready to drag him from where he was reaching out to. Turned out that he can walk while being wrapped around in wires. What a guy.

So using the wires, he dragged me into the village and I gave in. I guess it is not such a big deal, since we are technically still in our Land of Fire. Our mission has not officially started, in a sense of speaking.

Naturally, he ordered ramen. I gloated when he realised that their ramen tasted terrible.

Being the nice person I am and also taking pity on his constipated expression, I offered to change my plate of rice with him. What sort of potential partner am I if I let him suffer?

Unless of course I am the one making him suffer that is, which is a whole story altogether.

Managed to swap his bowl with my plate and was about to take the first bite. Instead, Naruto grabbed his whole bowl and just gulped down the contents. I stared, it was a pretty big bowl. Naruto gave a grossed-out look after he was done.

When I asked him why he did not let me eat it for him, seeing that I am less picky and more tolerant with my food, he gave me this scrutinizing look. Apparently he thinks that I am very picky and only eats food of a certain standard.

I think he had forgotten the existence of soldier pills.

Anyway, we left that village after lunch and continued our journey towards the borders separating us from the neighbouring land.

Initially, we travelled at the pace we had set in the morning. But after a while, it was clear that there was something wrong with Naruto when his pace slowed. He reassured me that he was fine and that we should hurry before he tried to pick up his pace. I let him, knowing that his pride would not allow him to slow us down.

Finally after night has fallen, I managed to talk him into stopping. He was clutching his stomach by this time and I am guessing it has something to do with the ramen he had for lunch.

I pretended that nothing was wrong and shoved him off to gather some firewood. Then I told him that I was going to set up camp and that he better not try and help lest he destroy our tent.

Of course, this was to give him an opportunity to take care of his business.

I even gathered the firewood for him. Now I have a valid reason to taunt him since I bet that he would come back to camp and forgot all about the wood.

So currently we are in the middle of nowhere. Well not exactly, we are at the borders of the Land of Fire and the un-named land that Kusa, the Village Hidden in the Grass, occupies. Just a few more feet and we would be reaching those patches of grass.

…okay, bad attempt at humor.

Naruto is taking an awful long time in returning. Reminds me of his spoilt milk incidents. Hopefully his stomach would recover after a good sleep.

Need to think of a reason to keep first watch so that he can sleep it off.

Signing off.


	8. Day Seven

Day Seven

Naruto woke me up with a displeased look. I think he was still upset that I woke him up late for his watch.

We set off after we cleared up the mess that was our camp and finally crossed the border. Made it to Kusa before lunch time. This round, we settled for the rations in our pack instead of risking the food in the Village.

After that we travelled a short while more before we reached the next border. The fences of Iwa were just visible from where we stood. There, we finally opened the scroll that Tsunade-sama had given us before we went on the mission.

Turned out it was not exactly a normal scouting mission. She wanted us to enter the Village instead of just prowling and observing from the outside.

We had three choices. The first was to enter as two males under either a disguise or a Henge. The second was to enter as two females. The third was to enter as a male and a female. Big difference.

After much debate, we decided on the third choice. The first was out since we did not want anyone to link our alias to two male Konoha ninjas. The second, because it was too conspicuous for two females to travel alone. And also partly I have no interest in becoming a female.

Of course Naruto protested on being assigned the female role automatically but I pointed out that at least he had done it before and so it should be no big deal to him.

I won the argument in the end. But I was not exactly pleased with the result. He insisted that since the Hokage never prepared a solid story for us to follow, he came up with one very believable story himself.

Just how is it believable? Two old man and woman travelling across countries looking for good ramen recipe? Only Naruto could think up of such things.

He even made us start the pretend a good distance away from the actual entrance of Iwa. Backs hunched and feet dragging. Our pace was so slow that we only made it to the entrance just as the sun was setting.

You have no idea how tired and exasperated I was at this time. Instead of any trepidation that the guards at the entrance would recognise us, all I had on my mind was to make it to a hotel and rest my back. Bad posture is a terrible thing.

Amazingly, the guards bought Naruto's excuse since Naruto almost launched into a discussion of ramen when one of the guards looked doubtful.

I wonder if the information of Naruto liking ramen has spread to the other Villages yet. Hopefully not. Otherwise, Iwa might link this ramen couple to Konoha's ramen loving fool.

We finally managed to make it to the inn. The innkeeper was relatively friendly and was all on helping us up the stairs but the way that his eyes keep travelling to the money pouch that was dangling on Naruto's belt, I doubt he was really just being helpful.

The room was relatively small but it was clean and it had a bathroom, so that makes up for the size. There was only one bed in the room and I swear that Naruto's eyes almost dropped out from his head. I had to refrain myself from smirking outwardly then, it would be very enjoyable to engage Naruto in a futile conversation of who-gets-the-bed-and-who-gets-the-floor tonight. Especially when I had no intention of letting either of us sleep on the floor.

We started our reconnaissance immediately, slowly trudging down the stairs and waving to the rest of the people who were living in the inn to keep up appearances.

Anyway, at least something good came out of this disguise. I had a readily available excuse for every time I reached out to hold Naruto's shoulder or elbow. He was a kind old lady and I was his husband who was just making sure that his wife does not trip and fall and injure herself. Of course Naruto made it all the more believable when he let the face of the old lady blush. The people on the street smiled at us when I did this.

After some walking and browsing in some of the small shops, we chose a restaurant that was in the centre of the busy town. There were a large number of eateries in the area but the choice was simple. From where we stood near the entrance of the place, we could already see a bunch of men sitting in one corner and judging from their mannerisms, they looked to be shinobis. That ought to be a good information source. We chose a seat near them and took up our menu as we listened to their conversation.

Since the nature of this mission is classified, there is not much details that I can actually write in here. Just know that they had a relatively loose mouth and were spewing information left, right and centre, even things that concerned the safety of their nation. I guess Iwa-nins had too much faith in their security.

That does not speak much for them, seeing that they let people like us through their gates without suspecting anything.

Naruto ordered some ramen for dinner, claiming that we must at least stick to our story of being ramen researchers. I find it amazing that he had not learnt his lesson from the ramen yesterday.

In the end, Naruto asked to speak to the chef, on the pretext of having tasted the best ramen in his life and wanting to get the recipe. I had to stop myself from hitting him when the chef who greeted us at our table led us to the kitchen.

We got the recipe and even better, we got even more information and gossips about the upcoming Chuunin exams. Naruto was surprisingly smooth and was sweet-talking the chef into giving us a lot of details, acting like the curious old lady that he looked.

Well, for once, ramen is actually useful. Just do not let Naruto hear me say that.

It was rather late when we left the restaurant and we just hung around the market place. The only people on the street were males who were returning home. There were also some Iwa-nins walking around and we discreetly observed their movements as we walked back to our own inn. They seemed far too confident in their own abilities, getting drunk and wasted on the streets.

Or maybe all these are to throw any other spies off their trail?

Well, that does not matter. As long as they are not planning a rebellion anytime soon or plotting an assassination against the kages, they are allowed to keep pretending to be weak.

That is, if they are pretending.

We were back in our room quickly enough and Naruto soon started the argument of removing his disguise. I guess he was uncomfortable with bathing and sleeping in an old woman's body. After much debate, we checked the room over for any chances of being spied upon and set up some genjutsu through the window. Just in case someone decides to look in.

Amazingly enough, Naruto never raised the argument about sharing the bed. Instead he just threw his things on it and told me not to fall asleep before he came out of the bath.

Of course I would never complain about sharing a bed with him.

Oh crap, Naruto came out of the bath and is looking at me with this amused smirk. I think I should put this journal away before he gets the idea to peek. And he better not tease me about having a girly diary.

Signing off.


End file.
